Set Back

During some down time at work yesterday, I created a schedule for the evening for myself. You see, I work an hour away from home and I’m the kind of person that needs sleep so I like to be in bed by 10 or 10:30, which leaves little time to get a lot of things done when I get home.

The plan was to go home, feed the puppies, go for a run (starting at just 1 mile since it’s been awhile), have dinner, prepare some of tonight’s dinner so there is less to do, finish writing thank you cards for the wedding (hey, ettiquette says we have a year!), clip my coupons from Sunday’s paper, take a shower, research some recipes for my Pampered Chef Deep Covered Baker and then hopefully get to just “sit” for a little while before bed.

It all got done except for the thank you cards – maybe I’ll tackle those Saturday afternoon. My run though? My run was awful.

I mentioned that I had cut my foot pretty badly back in August. The experience was less than pleasant and as I was holding L’s hand, crying while the doctor phsychian’s assistant stitched it up, L mentioned that it might be a good idea to start saving our money – “I hear adoption is expensive.” Hey, I’ve always told him I was a baby. And I’ve never had anything like that done before.

Anyway, the hospital I went to doesn’t have the best reputation, but I was just going for some stitches, not because I had a stroke or something. It’s not a bad hospital – there are just better ones around. But it was the closest one and when this all happened, L was three hours away and one of our friends (also an EMT – it pays to know all these people) was the one who came over, wrapped my foot up and took me to the hospital until L got there (yes, L got to the hospital from 3 hours away before they even began my stitches – and we had gone as soon as I cut my foot).

As L was watching them stitch up my foot (I obviously had my eyes closed and would have passed out if I had not been lying down) he wasn’t too impressed with the work. He thought one of them was kind of loose and he also thought I should have had 1-2 more – and maybe 1-2 internal stitches because it was so deep. But the PA thought it was fine and I was bandaged up and set on my way to limp out of the ER.

Truth be told, I probably walked on it much more than I should have in the days following. I couldn’t help it – I had things to do – our wedding was in three weeks! Because it was on the inside of my left foot, kind of on my arch, I walked on the outside of my foot. It took much longer to heal than I had thought it would or than the PA said (perhaps bc I wasn’t too good at staying off of it). L had to clean it for me (I almost passed out twice in the process) and when I went to the Minute Clinic at CVS to have them removed ($70 to remove stitches with no insurance!), I almost passed out there too. I was still afraid it was going to pop back open, so I continued to walk on the side of my foot.

Fast forward to the last couple weeks. I initially started running again at the beginning of December. I was determined to train in time to run a half at the end of February. The first day was awful, as I knew it would be since it had been about 7 months since I really ran. By the time I got to day 3, the outside of my left ankle was beginning to hurt. Something I had never experienced before. It was then that I realized I was running on the outside of my left foot. Apparently I have been doing this all along, just not as severly as when I hurt my foot. I looked at a pair of flats I wear to work all the time, and I can see where the side has been rubbing against the ground.

Damn. There goes the half. This was going to take work to start running in correct form again.

So last night I went out and did just that. It was the first time I ran since day 3 at the beginning of December. I made sure to really focus on running correctly on my left foot. And unlike the last times I had run, I felt good. I made it to a half a mile in just over 5 minutes (that’s good for me). But I noticed that my foot was starting to hurt. And it hurt more and more with every step. Not my ankle like last time, but my foot where the scar is.

I didn’t even make it to 3/4 of a mile before I had to stop. It was awful. And even as I walked the rest of the way to the car, it hurt so much it made me want to cry. Although, part of the tears were partly due to frustration as well.

I’m hoping that it’s just because I have been favoring the outside of my foot so much and that I just need to build the strength (and tolerance) back up for the inside part. I have been trying to be more mindful of how I walk in general and notice how easily my foot rolls to the side. This all seems to explain why my foot gets so sore when I wear heals now (which is very infrequently – bc of the soreness) – it’s because I can’t as easily roll my foot in those as I can in flats or sandals. That’s my diagnosis anyway.

My goal for tonight was to run 1.5 miles, but I’m just going to do as much as I can. I don’t want to overdo it, but I have to keep going.

The Beginning

2011 Goal #1 is to lose weight and become more fit.  And really, to try an maintain it for more than a year.  I did not begin on January 1 though – I felt like that would be asking for failure.  The pressure, you know.  Instead, I spent the day sleeping until 1pm (went to bed on the floor at our friend’s house at 3am, got up at 6 with L so he could go to work and I could go let the dogs out, went back to bed at 7:30 and slept till 1), which I hadn’t done in, well, I can’t even remember.  I vegged on the couch recovering from the night before – more due to exhaustion than a hangover.  (I remembered to take my multi-vitamin before bed which is the hangover cure.  Seriously wish I knew about that in college.)  Rather than joining the rest of the south in eating greens and black eye peas for good luck in the new year, I ate my most favorite meal one last time to get it out of my system – mac & cheese with hot dogs mixed in.  Yup, I’m a 6 year old at heart.
 
Yesterday was not the beginning of the goal either.  L and I spent the day running some errands and window shopping and eating our last bad-for-you meals together.  We did come up with a menu for dinners this week and went grocery shopping to get everything we needed (Goal #6 – cook more meals at home).  While we were out, I also picked up two newspapers so I could start clipping my coupons (Goal #5).
 
Our house is for sale (yay! now someone please buy it. soon. for what we’re asking. at least close to it.) and we were lucky enough to have two showings in the past week.  But we had to do a major clean up in a short amount of time before the last one and we were both scrambling.  We knew we had to get the house back in show order this weekend to avoid that in the future.  So once we got home from our day-long outing, that’s what we did.  Cleaned out the fridge and cabinets while putting away groceries and then cleaned the rest of the house, put away laundry, etc.  It is spic and span now. 
 
In the process, we took the time to weigh ourselves for our official starting weight.  Normally we would do this in the morning and not at the end of the day after a big meal.  But by doing it then, we felt like it gave us a head start bc obviously there would be some change between last night and this morning already.  No, it’s not cheating.  And, oh holy hell, I almost died when I saw that number on the scale.  I even stepped off and stepped back on to make sure.  You know how I told you I’ve seen numbers I’ve never seen before?  Yeah, take that and add about 7lbs!  What the hell have I been doing?!  Once that was done, we took some before pictures.  I was going to post them even though I knew they would be bad and embarrasing, but then I saw them and decided there was no way in hell I was doing that.  Did I mention we did them in bathing suits?  Yeah, about that.  Not pretty.  Maybe when I met my goal and I feel better about myself, I’ll post them in conjunction with the after pictures.  Maybe.
 
We didn’t go to bed until at least 12:30.  No good.  Which made getting up this morning difficult.  But I prepared what I hope is a halfway healthy lunch (or at least not as bad for me as what it could be) and headed to work after 11 days off.  Tonight, I’ll go home and get a run in too.  If I wasn’t motivated to succeed at this goal before, I sure am now after seeing those pictures!

Bring On 2011

Last night I got to do something for the very first time - I got to kiss my husband at midnight as we rang in the new year together.  The beginning of the first full calendar year as a married couple.  And how wonderful it was.  I think it’s fitting that L is the only “real” person I’ve kissed at midnight.  That sounds weird, doesn’t it?  I’m sure there were random people I kissed at midnight – perhaps – but I don’t really remember a lot of those nights.  L is the only one that I kissed that I wanted to kiss.  That I looked forward to kissing.  That ringing in a new year with a kiss with him meant something.  And now he will be the only one I kiss.  Until there are little humans around our home one day and we kiss them, too.

We celebrated with some of my best friends, something we hadn’t done the last two years as we had hung out with a different group of friends.  It was a low key night at a friend’s house, but so fun.  Lots of food, beer, champagne and laughing.  We had lots to celebrate – the first of my close knit friends is expecting twins in July; mine and L’s marriage along with another good friend’s marriage; and E’s engagement – yup, she’s getting married in May.

We’ve come a long way from the days of going out downtown and staying at a hotel.  Nobody got “lost” this year, no one walked 15 minutes from the bar to the hotel barefoot and almost through shattered glass, no one brought any random guys back.  We’ve definitely grown up.  There were babies at the party! (sort of)  There were wedding rings on!  There was talk of buying new cars and new homes and when they planned on “trying”.  It’s amazing to see how we’ve grown.  And how we’ve grown together.  Adding in new members to our circle (husbands and fiances).  It was a wonderful night.

I never make very original resolutions.  Mine are usually the cliche lose weight, get in shape, etc., etc., etc.  This year I’m making goals.  Maybe changing the term will take a little pressure off.  Some are cliche, some aren’t.

1. Lose weight (cliche) 
Last year I had done so well dropping the pounds between January and March for the Cooper River Bride Run.  I lost about 20lbs, but it easily inched back on.  And at our wedding, I wasn’t quite as hefty as I was at the turn of the new year, but I wasn’t as skinny as I wanted to be either.  And since then, I’ve definitely packed them on.  Dear Lord, I have seen numbers on that scale that I have never, EVER seen before.  And I would like to stop seeing them.  The goal is to lose 25lbs by E’s wedding in the middle of May.  When I ring in 2012, I would like to be back at the weight I was when I first did Weight Watchers out of college – that means I have to lose 50lbs.  I hope I can acheive that before next new year’s, but I’m keeping my goals realistic.

2. Improve my time for the CRBR
Last year I ran the race in 1:06:30.  Not too shabby considering I ran a mile for the very first time only 6 months prior.  This year, my goal is two part.  I want to at least run it in 1:03:30 – shave off three minutes.  My ultimate goal, which is a lofty one I know, is to finish in 59:59.  I just want to say I was able to do it in under an hour.  That’s a lot to shave off in three months though – especially since I have to work on my form because I’m running funny on the foot that I cut over the summer.

3. Run a half-marathon
I was hoping to be able to run one this year, but wedding planning kind of got in the way.  I want to be able to run one next fall.  There are some in the late spring that I could try for, but I want to make sure I’m really ready.  L is going to do it with me and we’re going to chose one in a destination so we get a mini-vaca out of it too.  I’m pretty sure I can talk E and LM into it as well.  There are races in Savannah, the Outerbanks and Kiawah Island in October/November that I’m considering.

4. Take better care of my skin
I usually take a shower at night, but when I don’t, I need to be more diligent about taking off my make-up.  Using a better moisturizer and maybe some anti-aging stuff (nothing hardcore).  I hear all those grocery store products actually work, but you should start before the problems actually begin.  I was going to do this around my 26th bday, but never got my act together.

5. Start Couponing
Several of my friends are those crazy couponers that get $100 worth of groceries but only pay $15.  They’ve begun to teach me their ways and now I just need to actually start trying it.

6. Cook more meals
L grew up eating out a lot, so our habit of hardly ever eating at home is nothing out of the ordinary for him.  For awhile, we did good coming up with menus and eating at home all the time.  We need to get back into this, both to save money and to eat better too.  This will hopefully go hand in hand with the couponing.  I hope that we can cut back to eating out only once or twice a week.

7. Do something about grad school
I’ve been toying with the idea of going back to school for quite some time.  For awhile it was for a career change, but now that I know there is a job out there that I like in my field, I want to proceed with getting my master’s.  My alma mater has a pretty good program, but because of my grades from undergrad, it will be difficult for me to get in.  It’s amazing how making a few mistakes your freshman year can affect you for so long.  I think I’ve got a shot, but we’ll see.  I want to at least look into it more, make sure we can afford it, perhaps apply.

8. Walk the puppies more
We FINALLY finished fencing in our backyard so the puppies get to run around a lot and they love it.  But I would still like to walk them more.  It’s hard because they don’t walk very well on a leash, and I think that’s what deters me from it, but they’re never going to learn if we don’t try.

9. Remain dedicated to my husband
L’s schedule can be trying sometimes.  It’s hard for me when he’s away at work and always busy.  I know there are people out there who have it way worse than me – all the military families serving our country – but it’s still hard.  I want us to continue to work to make our relationship and marriage the best it can be.  Because marriage is work, and we’ve got a great one. 

10. Begin researching our family tree
I had to do this once in elementary school and I’m always fascinated by history.  When at the beach for a friend’s bachelorette party this past spring, some of the other girls were talking about how they are very into their geneology and all the different things they have discovered while researching.  I was intrigued.  While watching TV the other day, I saw several commercials for ancestry.com and decided to check it out.  I tried their free trial.  I brought the idea up to L about working on his too and compiling them now that we’re married.  He liked it.  Although a website like ancestry.com isn’t necessary, it definitely  helps.  It’s rather expensive, especially to get the global version which I need more than L since my grandparents came through Ellis Island.  This will obviously a long-term project, but the goal is to get it started.

2010, you have been one hell of a year.  One that I will never, ever forget.  L and I will always celebrate you.  But 2011, watch out, I’m coming at you!

A Myriad of Celebrations

Man, everytime I try to get back on the blogging track, it just doesn’t happen.  But, for anyone who is out there still reading this, here are my celebrations of late.

February 14 – the third Valentine’s Day that I have spent with L.  And it couldn’t have been more perfect.  I spent 24 years being bitter on Valentine’s Day because I never had anyone to celebrate with.  When CR  told me one year that I shouldn’t be bitter because all my friends loved me, I had to gently remind her that I would be sitting in our dorm room by myself that night while she and all other said friends were out with their boyfriends.  But not anymore.  I’ll pause so you can go vomit.  I don’t care.  It was so, so perfect.  But it was nothing crazy.  We’ve gone out for V-day the last couple years, but we decided to stay in this year. 

The morning started off when L came home from work with a dozen roses in hand and two cards – one funny and one sweet.  And his gift?  A new bottle of my favorite perfume, Chanel Chance.  He was quick to tell me, it wasn’t because he thought I smelled though. haha, silly boy.  I gifted him with some Bose in-ear headphones for his ipod (get these brand new off ebay for half the price they are in Best Buy.  I’m just saying.) and a “Deck of  Love.”

I originally saw the Deck of Love mentioned on a crafty blog that linked here.  What a cute, meaningful and inexpensive idea.  I set off to create my own deck of 52 reasons why I love L.  He seemed to really like it, and ignored the card that was stained with blood.  Note to self, when cutting through Xyroned paper with your good scissors, sticky stuff will get on them.  Do NOT attempt to rub the sticky stuff off bare-fingered.  You will slice your thumb open.  It will hurt a lot.  And it will bleed a lot.

Then we went to church.  Yup, you read that correctly.  We went to church.  We’re still trying to figure out who is going to actually marry us.  We tried a Lutheran church in town that a few of our friends attend.  It was very nice, and much more similar to what I’m used to than what I would have thought.  L said it was very different to him, and there were a few things he would have to get used to, but he wasn’t opposed to it.  We admitted that we were both very nervous before we went in, but left very comfortable.  This coming Sunday, we’re trying a Methodist church. 

We headed out to grab a quick lunch and hoped to see Valentine’s Day, but all the showings were sold out.  Instead, we went back home and napped for an hour (unusual for me, but I was exhausted for some reason) and then headed out to a training program for the Cooper River Bridge Run 10k we are doing in Charleston next month.  I kicked ass, again.   Never would have thought so based on how I started the program (finishing at the end of my group).  But I was so proud of myself.  We did 3.5 miles and I’m in the 12 minute walk/run group (run 2 minutes, walk 1 minute). We went home, showered and L made me dinner – baked ziti because that’s the first meal he made for me when I came over when we first started dating.

Then we sat on the couch and watched the Olympics.  Nothing glamorous, but oh so perfect.

Beautiful roses

How glamorous.  No makeup. Wet hair. And Pjs.  But it was a great V-day!

February 15 – Our three year anniversary.  On one hand, I can’t believe it has been three years already.  On the other hand, it feels like so much more than that.  We spent the day together running errands and killing time while I waited for UPS to deliver his present (since for some reason it took over a week to ship!).  L ran out for his own errand at one point and came home with a beautiful bouquet of flowers and three envelopes.  By this time, his present had come and I had wrapped it.  I got a very cute card and tickets to Jersey Boys!  I have been wanting to see this for SUCH a long time!  I can’t wait.  And he definitely learned after last year’s handed-me-the-lap-top-to-show-me-what-my-present-was.  In envelope number 1, there was a series of pieces of paper “can’t take my eyes off of you”, “Downtown Charlotte”, “Turnpikes”, “Broadway”, “Garden State”, “Big Girls Don’t Cry”.  By the time I got to “turnpikes”, I knew what it was.  The second envelope held the tickets.  So very perfect and I can’t wait to go!!  He seemed pretty happy with the ipod Nano I got him too!  Ok, so I may have broken our $50 spending limit, but I did get it on overstock.com for a fantastic price.  I bought him the nike+ for running for Christmas and didn’t realize it didn’t work with the ipod classic (they should really put that on the box somewhere).  He’s been wanting the nano and almost bought it the week before, but I managed to make him wait.

We both had to attend a board meeting for the VFD that night and thought about going to dinner afterwards around 8, but then we decided on a different restaurant and postponed our date until Tuesday.

Pretty Pink Flowers.

February 16 – L was working at the VFD during the day and I went up to run on the treadmill before we went to dinner.  My goal was to run 4 miles because that’s what our training program will be this week.  I started off running a mile with no incline.  Then I increased the incline to 4 percent (that’s what the bridge is) and tried to run that as far as I could.  The bridge is 4 percent for almost a mile and a half – whoo!  I knew I had to run at the incline for at least a half mile, because that’s what I did last time.  My goal was to go .6 miles, but once I got there, I knew I could go more and did .75 miles at the incline.  I was hurting, but it felt good to know I went so far.  I went back to a 0 incline and finished running the second mile.  Then I kept going.  I tried to run 4 minutes, walk 1 minute.  Sometimes I did more runing than that, but I never did more than one minute of walking at a time.  I got to 4 miles and felt good so I kept going.  Before I knew it, I was at 5 miles.  The farthest I’ve ever been.  I wanted to go to 5.5.  And then I thought, if I can do 5.5 , then I can get to 6.2.  And I did.  6.2 miles!  That’s exactly what the 10k is.  I was so freaking proud of myself.  Granted it wasn’t ALL running, but it was MOSTLY running.  L had come in just as I was finishing and he couldn’t believe.  The best part?  If I didn’t need to go home and shower for dinner, I could have kept going.

So I went home and showered and a while later we headed downtown to Chima.  It’s a Brazillian steakhouse that we’ve heard amazing things about.  Basically, there’s a very generous salad bar and then you have this little coin at your place setting.  If you want meat, you turn it to the orange side.  If you need a break, you turn it to the black side.  There are all these meat men (they had some Brazillian name, but I dont remember what it was) moving around the restaurant with large spicks with different meats on them.  And it was so freakin good.  Filet mignon, sirloin, rib eye, salmon, swordfish, leg of lamb, chicken, bacon wrapped chicken, beef ribs, the list goes on.  I only ate breakfast to prepare for this.  And we left barely able to move we were so full.

It’s quite expensive, about $44 a person, but completely worht it and we definitely got our money’s worth.  Plus, we signed up online to be a ‘preferred diner’ and got a coupon for $25 off, so that helped a lot.  I highly recommend this place if you’re ever in Charlotte, Ft. Lauderdale, Philly or Tyson’s Corner Virginia.

L should be our wedding photographer. How perfect is this shot?  One take and super fast becuase it was FREEZING outside.

Such a wonderful week of celebrations.  And everything was so perfect.  The celebrating isn’t quite over yet – my birthday is Saturday!  I think L is very excited for our official anniversary to be in September after we’re married.  He’s got three celebrations within 5 days of each other now!

On Your Mark, Get Set, Go!

A mish mosh, per the usual:

- Tomorrow is a big day.  I’m running in my very first 5k on my college’s campus.  I’m really scared that I’m not going to be able to run the whole thing.  I haven’t run in almost 2 weeks and L and I went to run the course a couple weeks ago and it was really hard because of the hills.  The route I normally run is completely flat.  But I’m going to try my best and that’s all that matters.

- Then I’ve got to come home and get ready quick so I can host a Pampered Chef party.  My former roommate E has become a consultant and I’m hosting a party to help her get the ball rolling on her new endeavor.  A lot of my friends had other stuff going on, but CR and two former colleagues are coming, so I’m excited to get to see all of them.

- I’ve spent the last couple days researching different venues for OUR WEDDING!  Now that I can actually do that and not have to be secretive about it.  This is actually the one thing that I didn’t do much of in all my preliminary research – look for a place.  I had some ideas written down, but not many.  The hardest part is deciding between the Charlotte-area or somewhere on the coast.  Both have pros and cons.  I’m wanting to get this part done soon because we’re thinking about Labor Day weekend, and obviously places fill up fast.  This is so much fun!

Oh, Why Hello There

Well, hello blog world.  Are you still there?  I’ve somewhat ignored this little space of mine.  I either haven’t had much to say, or I just plain didn’t feel like writing.  How could that be since I have no job?  I don’t know.  It’s weird.  Sometimes I have trouble mustering up the motivation for things.  Like how I’ve looked at the pile of clean laundry grow larger and larger, but I just can’t seem to bring myself to fold it and put it away.  Or all the projects I have come up with to work on now that I have all this free time, yet, I just haven’t done them.  I know that I’ll eventually get a job (I will right?  Because I’m starting to worry) and I won’t have ALL this time anymore and I’ll be mad at myself for not doing it.

So what have I been doing?  Eh, not a whole lot.  I still spend a lot of time taking the puppies to the dog park.  Sometimes we’ll spend 3 hours there.  I know I could spend some of that time doing these projects I’ve come up with, but I just love taking them and watching them play.  Plus it’s so good for them to get the exercise.  We go almost every day.  Not always for three hours, but we do do that often.  It kind of depends on the weather and how many dogs are there and how much they’re playing.  Over the last two weeks though, every single day we go at least one, sometimes more, person has asked me if Shep is a puppy.  I just laugh and tell them that no, he’s not.  He’s almost two years old.  The question usually comes when he “kneels” down on his front two paws with his butt in the air, tail wagging wildly, jumping and twisting around and barking.  He’s quite a site.

We finally spoke with L’s uncle’s vet about Shep’s eye.  He says he thinks we should wait before we take his eye out.  His gut feeling is that the tumor won’t grow beyond his skull, but it might be a good idea to get an ultrasound to use as a baseline for down the road.  Also, he thinks we should have been advised to do that in the very beginning.  I’m not too happy with our opthamologist.  I think that he based a lot of his advice on the fact that we mentioned we didn’t have a lot of money to spend.  But what we met was that, we might not be able to pay for a $2500 treatment that day, but if it’s necessary, we can save our money and do it at a point in the future.  You know what I mean?  Anyway, we may go back or we may go to an opthamologist in Raleigh that works with NC State University’s Vetrinary School that was recommended by L’s uncle’s vet.

In other doggy eye news, he’s got this weird white/greenish gunk coming out of his eye.  I think it might be infected, so we’re trying to get him in this week to be looked at.  My poor puppy.

L surprised me with tickets to A Chorus Line on Saturday night.  I had mentioned that I wanted to go and then I just never bought the tickets, but he did.  It was a great show and a wonderful night together.

We’ve worked on the yard.  A lot!  We spend all day Saturday dethatching, aerating, watering, etc.  Hopefully we’ll actually be able to grow grass this year.  We’ve have a lot more wood to build the fence with and will be working on that too.  It was important to get the grass worked on so L could put seed down before it gets too cold.

Let’s see, what else?

L was at work last night and our friend had to come over when I heard a noise.  It sounded like something fell in the laundry room.  Even though the puppies didn’t budge, it still scared me.  I called L and he stayed on the phone with me while I checked the laundry room, garage and porch and found nothing.  While I was standing in the laundry room, I heard another noise that sounded like it was coming from underneath the house.  It was probably just Shep flopping down on the floor, but then I remembered we never locked the door to the crawl space the day before.  I freaked out so L had our friend come over and check it out.  And he didn’t even make fun of me.   Not to my face at least.

This same friend lives in a really nice neighborhood around the corner from us.  He and L worked together today in town and I went to lunch with them.  They stopped by his house first and L walked into the house across from him that the developer foreclosed on and told me all about it.  It sounded beautiful (plus I know how nice or friend’s house is, so I figured it had to be similar).  L took me over there after lunch and oh my God, I WANT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  It is a steal, too.  Still more than we could afford, but both our friend and L said that it would be worth lowballing them for a better price bc they likely just want to get it off their hands.  It would be an awesome investment too since they are selling if for about $120,000 LESS than what it’s worth.

I want it.  No, like, I REALLY want it.  L said that he wants to just throw an offer out to them.  And I hate when he says stuff like that because he never acts on it, but it gets my  hopes up.  I mean, the liklihood of them accepting what we would be able to offer is slim, but it’s still the excitement of doing it. 

The house is unfinished and our friend was suggesting to put in the offer that they could leave things out, like carpeting, etc. to help.  I would love it if we could even look into it more, but I’m trying my best not to get my hopes up, because this is the one thing that L doesn’t really come through on.  He talks a lot of talk about it, but rarely does anything.  Perhaps this is why I’m bad at window shopping in general.

But if we were across the street from our friend – it’s a whole lot closer for him when I hear a strange noise

We’ve got lots of stuff going on this October (also, how is it October already?).  L’s birthday is coming up which means a trip to his parent’s house and the state fair which I’m pretty excited about. 

We’re running two 5ks this month.  My very first.  We were only going to do one, but they just scheduled one on my college campus, so I really want to do that too.

Speaking of running, I’ve run 4 miles.  At one time.  Without stopping.  Pretty amazing if you ask me.  It takes me awhile to do it, but I’m not going for time.  I just want to do it.

I booked a hotel room for the Cooper River Bridge Run which is March 27.  They are very expensive that weekend and I’m afraid of them selling out, so I just went ahead and got one. 

I guess that’s it.  I’ll try to post a little more frequently.  As I try to get more motivation for toher stuff in life too!

Just Call Me Forrest

What?  I’m actually making progress on my running?  No way!  That 5k is starting to seem more realistic every day.  Last week I ran a mile without stopping for the first time in my entire life.  And then, I did it again.  I was so impressed and proud of myself.

On Monday, I met L at the fire station where we worked out for 30 minutes and then finished up with a run outside.  We did our own thing at the gym and I was finishing up just after him.  I tried to increase the weight a little on a couple of the things I did, so I did the same on my last routine.  I was doing those things where you hold a weight behind your head and lift it up – to work on the jiggly, underside of your arm (triceps, I believe is he correct term).  When we first started doing this a couple weeks ago, I used a 5lb weight, but realized it was a little too easy, so I moved on to an 8lb weight.  Monday I was going to go for the 12lb-er.  That’s when L just looked at me and was like, “um, no.  Use the 25lb one.”  Was he crazy?  I can’t lift 25lbs up and down behind my head.  “You’re selling yourself short, I know you can do it.  You’re a lot stronger than you think.”  So I went for the 20lb one and you know what?  I did it.

We headed over to wear we run and walked a half mile first.  I was tired, but didn’t want to admit it.  We started running and weren’t too far into when L mentioned how heavy his legs felt.  Oh thank God, it wasn’t just me.  I barely made it a half mile, but when I made the turn it felt better – for about 30 seconds.  It was rough.  We finished up the mile and didn’t stop and kept going.  Our goal was to finish a mile and a half.  And we did.  But I will not deny that I almost didn’t make it.  And possibly grunted like a cave man during the last two tenths of a mile.

BUT.  Not only did I do a mile, but I did a mile and a half.  During the grunting phase of the run, L kept telling me that he would give me a 30 minute back massage if I made it.   After we finished, he confessed he didn’t think I was going to make it because I had already said I was going to quit.  But I didn’t.  Woo, go me!

Yesterday, I went out by myself and did it again.  This time there was no grunting.  And this time I also didn’t do a mile and a half.  I did 1.8 miles!  If I hadn’t have eaten dinner earlier, I think I could have made it the whole two miles.  I couldn’t believe it.  The two mile mark was in sight this time. 

The 3.1 miles is getting closer and closer.  And I still have about 51 days to practice!  I don’t want to keel over as I’m crossing the finish line, and I know I’ll probably be one of the last runners, but as long as I finish, that’s all I care about.  And I still have plenty of time to improve some.

Oh, and I can practice in a lovely environment this weekend.  At the beach!  I really thought that when L called his mom she was going to say the condo was already being used, but it’s not!  I really can not describe just how excited I am to go this weekend.  We’re definitely going Friday – Sunday.  L is scheduled to work at his pt job on Monday, but he’s going to see if he can switch it for another day so we can stay through Monday.   The beach makes me happy!

This and That

Wow.  So it’s been awhile since I posted.  But frankly, when one doesn’t have a job,  I just don’t always have a lot to say.  I will say though that I’ve been able to fill up my days better than I thought I would and some other exciting things have happened too (no, L has not proposed).

- L and I booked a trip to Cabo for next July!  Yes, the girl without a job just booked a 8 day/7 night trip to Cabo at a 4 star all-inclusive resort.  Actually, this trip has been in the works for 3 years now.  My friend LM once said that if she wasn’t seriously dating someone by her 30th birthday, that we were all going to go to Cabo to celebrate her birthday in lieu of a bachelorette party.  Well, a year from next month, LM will be turning 30, and since no boyfriend is in the picture, we’re packing our bags.  But frankly, I pretty sure we would have gone anyway.  At first it was just a girls trip, but then she invited boyfriends/husbands as well.  Invitations went out and the estimated cost was between $1500 and 2000 including airfare.  Yes, meals and even alcohol are included as well, but still, that is a lot of money!   Then two weeks later I lost my job.  L said he wasn’t going if it was that expensive and he would help me pay my way since we’ve been planning this for so long.  Well, LM went to actually book the trip and we got an amazing deal – this trip, including everything is no longer $2000 – but a mere $900.  Whoa!  So excited.  And L is coming too!

- And since we’ll be spending a week by the pool, we’ve got to get in shape (and you know, maybe something else will be next year too that we will want to look our best for).  So L and I have started working out at the gym at the vol FD.  The crazy thing?  I actually enjoy it and look forward to it.  Wow.  Never thought I’d say that.

-The other day it was so nice out, we had a cool spell and I just wanted to be outside.  Rather than working out at the gym, we decided to go run outside.  Oh yeah.  Remember that?  How I was going to try to run?  Well, that kind of fell by the wayside when it was like 95+ degrees everyday.  You know what else happened that day?  I ran a WHOLE mile.  Without stopping.  Yes, yes.  A mile is not much.  But to me, it is HUGE.  Never before have I done this.  Don’t get me wrong, the end was painful and I’m sure I was a sight to see, but I still did it.  For the first half of the run, it actually felt GOOD.  And I thought to myself, ohhh, this is why people do it.  I really think the working out L and I have been doing has helped a lot. 

-I still want to do the Cooper River Bridge Run in April and have a long way to go, but I’ve decided I need smaller goals in between.  On Halloween morning, we’ll be doing a 5K around the airport and part of it is even on one of the runways.  And in December we’ll be doing another one.

- And what’s crazier – yesterday I ran a mile AGAIN.  By myself.  I didn’t even have L there to push me.  Very early on I didn’t think I was going to make it, but I just kept pushing myself.  It was incredible.

-In other news, I’ve taken the puppies to the park a lot, I’ve been doing other On Demand workouts and I’ve been searching for a job.

-I’ve found lots of jobs to apply for, but just haven’t really gotten anywhere with them.  I just want an interview!  Fingers crossed I’ll find something soon.

-L ended up with next Friday-Sunday completely off work.  I’m crossing my fingers that his parent’s beach condo is available and we can go.  We haven’t been to the beach since June and I’m itching to put my toes in the sand.

-And that’s about it!

Run, Forrest, Run

I have never been a runner.  Never.  “The mile” was a dreaded phrase I associated with gym class since second grade when we had to start doing that as part of the physical fitness test. 

It hurts for me to run.  I get out of breath quickly and my chest becomes heavy and painful.  My legs and feet feel heavy too.  My hands get tingly and when I stop I feel light headed.  And, inevitably, I will always get a cramp in my side.

I have tried to focus on my breathing.  Keep a steady pace.  Not focus so much on how far the ending point is.  But it just never seems to help.  In my entire life, I have never run a full mile without stopping.

In school, I was often in the group that had to re-run it once, twice, three times, in order to get a passing time (don’t even get me started on those physical fitness tests, I think they’re a load of crap and not something you should be graded on).

I have never been seriously overweight.  Sure, I hate the way I look and I say that I’m fat all the time.  And according to most of those height/weight charts, I have been “too heavy” for my height since childhood (don’t get me started on those charts either, because I think they’re a load of crap too).  But really?  If you look at me, I am not obese.  Not at all.  And most of the time, you would never think that I weigh nearly as much as I actually do.  I’m sure as hell not a super model, and at the moment, I’m definitely heavier than I need to be.  But I’m not seriously overweight.

I’m not sure what the problem is, but apparently, I’ve never been very cardiovascularly fit.  I danced for 15 years growing up.  That was 15 years of feeling like I was going to die when I walked off stage because I couldn’t breathe.  It wasn’t until I was practically crawling out of the stage wings after a performance at a dance competition in high school when my parents had to carry me outside that I went to the doctor and was diagnosed with exercise enduced asthma.  I did the whole inhaler routine and all, and it was what it was, but at this point, I think I’m just not “fit.”

Even though I have never been a runner, I  have always wanted to be a runner.  I want to be one of those people that goes out for a run when they’re stressed and they feel good when they’re done, not like it was a punishment for a vicious crime they committed.

Over the last several months, I’ve talked about how I want to get in shape, get back to the size I was the year after I graduated college.  My goal was to not be embarrassed at the beach this summer or to not feel ugly and fat whenever L and I get married.  I’ve done ok, but haven’t lost more than three pounds, which really isn’t enough.

Last week, I came up with a new motivation.  I love to travel and I love pretty little southern cities.  You know, like Charleston.  I’ve been there a couple times before and it’s on my and L’s list of places we’d like to visit – especially since he’s never been.  But, we’re not the people that can just pick up and go to Charleston any weekend.  It’s about 4 1/2 hours away and it’s kind of expensive. 

But what takes place in Charleston every year that I would love to do?  The Cooper River Bridge Run.  I’ve heard of it before.  It’s a 10k race that thousands and thousands of people run in every year.  And then when I went to look up information on it, I saw this poster:

Image Courtesy of Cooper River Bridge Run

I want to run over that bridge.  In pretty Charleston.  And feel really good about myself and accomplish something that I never thought I could ever do in my entire life.  I want to run that 10k.  Those (approximately) 6 miles without stopping.

I brought the idea up to L.  He likes to run.  I asked him if he would be interested in doing this with me.  Next year (since this year’s is like this weekend).  He could easily work up to 6 miles in no time, but I on the other hand need plenty of time to practice (ok, “train”, but I’m a dancer by nature and I prefer “practice” ). 

I thought it would be something we could do together.  Something that was ours.  And our reward will be staying in town for a long weekend and do the race and site see and enjoy the city together.  He liked the idea.

But I would need his help.  I can’t do this by myself because I know I won’t be able to push myself hard enough.

So last night we started.  I met him at the fire station after work and we began our first practice.  We didn’t bring the puppies with us because they get too distracted and get in your way or stop to smell things or chase birds or what have you.  This is something I’m really serious about, so I needed to focus.

All weekend L had been getting me ready.  Randomly giving me tips.  Telling me what we were going to do.  How there were no excuses.  How I can run farther than I think I can.  Not to go into it saying I’ll do my best, but go into it telling myself that I can and will do it.

We took part of the route we normally take our walks on.  We know how far each section is.  First we walked a mile to get warmed up.  Then we ran a half mile.  It was hard, but I made it all the way to the end.  I know that a half mile may seem like nothing or may seem like something to laugh at for most people, but for me this was a HUGE deal.  Besides yesterday, I had only run a half mile one other time in my life.  And that was sometime last summer when L tried to get me into running.  Unfortunately then we let our busy schedules get in the way and were not consistent about it.  Now, we have vowed not to let that happen.

He talked me through it the whole way.  Telling me I was doing good and I could do it and as we got closer to the end of that half mile he told me he would run ahead of me, strip naked and be waiting for me off the side of the road where no one could see us (which by the way, L, you did not fulfill that promise ).

We walked another quarter of a mile and then ran another quarter.  I really and truly did not think I was going to make it that time.  I slowed down to what was barely a jog.  In fact, I think a turtle could have jogged faster.  But I didn’t stop.  I didn’t walk – not even one step. 

It was definitely NOT pretty.  I could barely pick up my feet and I’m sure I looked like I had gotten hit by a truck, but I was still doing it.

But hey, Phoebe doesn’t run pretty either

Even though I looked like a fool, the whole time L stayed with me and told me to keep going.  “You’re almost there, the stop sign is getting closer, don’t look at the ground, just a few more yards, hit the stop sign and you’re done.”

We walked another mile and a half before heading home for dinner.  I still didn’t feel great.  It took me a long time to catch my breath and not feel like I was going to die.  My hands were still tingly and my head was still a little foggy.  But I did it.  Obviously I still need to focus on my breathing.  And just do that half mile 11 more times in a row to do the race next April.

And now I’m kind of excited to go again today.  L is at work, but I’m still going to go on my own and hope that I can push myself like he helped me do yesterday.

What else is pushing me besides the fact that I want to actually run the whole 10k next year?  Obviously, it’s that I’m already planning my running outfit.  Seriously.  Pink running shorts and a black racer back tank top – or maybe vice versa.  I told you, as soon as event comes up, no matter what it is, I like to plan an outfit.

Oh yeah, and my mom bought me these.  They should arrive tomorrow, I think.  It was about time, I’ve had my sneakers since my junior year of college – which was 5 years ago.  Yeah, I think I was due for a new pair.

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