Set Back

During some down time at work yesterday, I created a schedule for the evening for myself. You see, I work an hour away from home and I’m the kind of person that needs sleep so I like to be in bed by 10 or 10:30, which leaves little time to get a lot of things done when I get home.

The plan was to go home, feed the puppies, go for a run (starting at just 1 mile since it’s been awhile), have dinner, prepare some of tonight’s dinner so there is less to do, finish writing thank you cards for the wedding (hey, ettiquette says we have a year!), clip my coupons from Sunday’s paper, take a shower, research some recipes for my Pampered Chef Deep Covered Baker and then hopefully get to just “sit” for a little while before bed.

It all got done except for the thank you cards – maybe I’ll tackle those Saturday afternoon. My run though? My run was awful.

I mentioned that I had cut my foot pretty badly back in August. The experience was less than pleasant and as I was holding L’s hand, crying while the doctor phsychian’s assistant stitched it up, L mentioned that it might be a good idea to start saving our money – “I hear adoption is expensive.” Hey, I’ve always told him I was a baby. And I’ve never had anything like that done before.

Anyway, the hospital I went to doesn’t have the best reputation, but I was just going for some stitches, not because I had a stroke or something. It’s not a bad hospital – there are just better ones around. But it was the closest one and when this all happened, L was three hours away and one of our friends (also an EMT – it pays to know all these people) was the one who came over, wrapped my foot up and took me to the hospital until L got there (yes, L got to the hospital from 3 hours away before they even began my stitches – and we had gone as soon as I cut my foot).

As L was watching them stitch up my foot (I obviously had my eyes closed and would have passed out if I had not been lying down) he wasn’t too impressed with the work. He thought one of them was kind of loose and he also thought I should have had 1-2 more – and maybe 1-2 internal stitches because it was so deep. But the PA thought it was fine and I was bandaged up and set on my way to limp out of the ER.

Truth be told, I probably walked on it much more than I should have in the days following. I couldn’t help it – I had things to do – our wedding was in three weeks! Because it was on the inside of my left foot, kind of on my arch, I walked on the outside of my foot. It took much longer to heal than I had thought it would or than the PA said (perhaps bc I wasn’t too good at staying off of it). L had to clean it for me (I almost passed out twice in the process) and when I went to the Minute Clinic at CVS to have them removed ($70 to remove stitches with no insurance!), I almost passed out there too. I was still afraid it was going to pop back open, so I continued to walk on the side of my foot.

Fast forward to the last couple weeks. I initially started running again at the beginning of December. I was determined to train in time to run a half at the end of February. The first day was awful, as I knew it would be since it had been about 7 months since I really ran. By the time I got to day 3, the outside of my left ankle was beginning to hurt. Something I had never experienced before. It was then that I realized I was running on the outside of my left foot. Apparently I have been doing this all along, just not as severly as when I hurt my foot. I looked at a pair of flats I wear to work all the time, and I can see where the side has been rubbing against the ground.

Damn. There goes the half. This was going to take work to start running in correct form again.

So last night I went out and did just that. It was the first time I ran since day 3 at the beginning of December. I made sure to really focus on running correctly on my left foot. And unlike the last times I had run, I felt good. I made it to a half a mile in just over 5 minutes (that’s good for me). But I noticed that my foot was starting to hurt. And it hurt more and more with every step. Not my ankle like last time, but my foot where the scar is.

I didn’t even make it to 3/4 of a mile before I had to stop. It was awful. And even as I walked the rest of the way to the car, it hurt so much it made me want to cry. Although, part of the tears were partly due to frustration as well.

I’m hoping that it’s just because I have been favoring the outside of my foot so much and that I just need to build the strength (and tolerance) back up for the inside part. I have been trying to be more mindful of how I walk in general and notice how easily my foot rolls to the side. This all seems to explain why my foot gets so sore when I wear heals now (which is very infrequently – bc of the soreness) – it’s because I can’t as easily roll my foot in those as I can in flats or sandals. That’s my diagnosis anyway.

My goal for tonight was to run 1.5 miles, but I’m just going to do as much as I can. I don’t want to overdo it, but I have to keep going.

The Beginning

2011 Goal #1 is to lose weight and become more fit.  And really, to try an maintain it for more than a year.  I did not begin on January 1 though – I felt like that would be asking for failure.  The pressure, you know.  Instead, I spent the day sleeping until 1pm (went to bed on the floor at our friend’s house at 3am, got up at 6 with L so he could go to work and I could go let the dogs out, went back to bed at 7:30 and slept till 1), which I hadn’t done in, well, I can’t even remember.  I vegged on the couch recovering from the night before – more due to exhaustion than a hangover.  (I remembered to take my multi-vitamin before bed which is the hangover cure.  Seriously wish I knew about that in college.)  Rather than joining the rest of the south in eating greens and black eye peas for good luck in the new year, I ate my most favorite meal one last time to get it out of my system – mac & cheese with hot dogs mixed in.  Yup, I’m a 6 year old at heart.
 
Yesterday was not the beginning of the goal either.  L and I spent the day running some errands and window shopping and eating our last bad-for-you meals together.  We did come up with a menu for dinners this week and went grocery shopping to get everything we needed (Goal #6 – cook more meals at home).  While we were out, I also picked up two newspapers so I could start clipping my coupons (Goal #5).
 
Our house is for sale (yay! now someone please buy it. soon. for what we’re asking. at least close to it.) and we were lucky enough to have two showings in the past week.  But we had to do a major clean up in a short amount of time before the last one and we were both scrambling.  We knew we had to get the house back in show order this weekend to avoid that in the future.  So once we got home from our day-long outing, that’s what we did.  Cleaned out the fridge and cabinets while putting away groceries and then cleaned the rest of the house, put away laundry, etc.  It is spic and span now. 
 
In the process, we took the time to weigh ourselves for our official starting weight.  Normally we would do this in the morning and not at the end of the day after a big meal.  But by doing it then, we felt like it gave us a head start bc obviously there would be some change between last night and this morning already.  No, it’s not cheating.  And, oh holy hell, I almost died when I saw that number on the scale.  I even stepped off and stepped back on to make sure.  You know how I told you I’ve seen numbers I’ve never seen before?  Yeah, take that and add about 7lbs!  What the hell have I been doing?!  Once that was done, we took some before pictures.  I was going to post them even though I knew they would be bad and embarrasing, but then I saw them and decided there was no way in hell I was doing that.  Did I mention we did them in bathing suits?  Yeah, about that.  Not pretty.  Maybe when I met my goal and I feel better about myself, I’ll post them in conjunction with the after pictures.  Maybe.
 
We didn’t go to bed until at least 12:30.  No good.  Which made getting up this morning difficult.  But I prepared what I hope is a halfway healthy lunch (or at least not as bad for me as what it could be) and headed to work after 11 days off.  Tonight, I’ll go home and get a run in too.  If I wasn’t motivated to succeed at this goal before, I sure am now after seeing those pictures!

Bring On 2011

Last night I got to do something for the very first time - I got to kiss my husband at midnight as we rang in the new year together.  The beginning of the first full calendar year as a married couple.  And how wonderful it was.  I think it’s fitting that L is the only “real” person I’ve kissed at midnight.  That sounds weird, doesn’t it?  I’m sure there were random people I kissed at midnight – perhaps – but I don’t really remember a lot of those nights.  L is the only one that I kissed that I wanted to kiss.  That I looked forward to kissing.  That ringing in a new year with a kiss with him meant something.  And now he will be the only one I kiss.  Until there are little humans around our home one day and we kiss them, too.

We celebrated with some of my best friends, something we hadn’t done the last two years as we had hung out with a different group of friends.  It was a low key night at a friend’s house, but so fun.  Lots of food, beer, champagne and laughing.  We had lots to celebrate – the first of my close knit friends is expecting twins in July; mine and L’s marriage along with another good friend’s marriage; and E’s engagement – yup, she’s getting married in May.

We’ve come a long way from the days of going out downtown and staying at a hotel.  Nobody got “lost” this year, no one walked 15 minutes from the bar to the hotel barefoot and almost through shattered glass, no one brought any random guys back.  We’ve definitely grown up.  There were babies at the party! (sort of)  There were wedding rings on!  There was talk of buying new cars and new homes and when they planned on “trying”.  It’s amazing to see how we’ve grown.  And how we’ve grown together.  Adding in new members to our circle (husbands and fiances).  It was a wonderful night.

I never make very original resolutions.  Mine are usually the cliche lose weight, get in shape, etc., etc., etc.  This year I’m making goals.  Maybe changing the term will take a little pressure off.  Some are cliche, some aren’t.

1. Lose weight (cliche) 
Last year I had done so well dropping the pounds between January and March for the Cooper River Bride Run.  I lost about 20lbs, but it easily inched back on.  And at our wedding, I wasn’t quite as hefty as I was at the turn of the new year, but I wasn’t as skinny as I wanted to be either.  And since then, I’ve definitely packed them on.  Dear Lord, I have seen numbers on that scale that I have never, EVER seen before.  And I would like to stop seeing them.  The goal is to lose 25lbs by E’s wedding in the middle of May.  When I ring in 2012, I would like to be back at the weight I was when I first did Weight Watchers out of college – that means I have to lose 50lbs.  I hope I can acheive that before next new year’s, but I’m keeping my goals realistic.

2. Improve my time for the CRBR
Last year I ran the race in 1:06:30.  Not too shabby considering I ran a mile for the very first time only 6 months prior.  This year, my goal is two part.  I want to at least run it in 1:03:30 – shave off three minutes.  My ultimate goal, which is a lofty one I know, is to finish in 59:59.  I just want to say I was able to do it in under an hour.  That’s a lot to shave off in three months though – especially since I have to work on my form because I’m running funny on the foot that I cut over the summer.

3. Run a half-marathon
I was hoping to be able to run one this year, but wedding planning kind of got in the way.  I want to be able to run one next fall.  There are some in the late spring that I could try for, but I want to make sure I’m really ready.  L is going to do it with me and we’re going to chose one in a destination so we get a mini-vaca out of it too.  I’m pretty sure I can talk E and LM into it as well.  There are races in Savannah, the Outerbanks and Kiawah Island in October/November that I’m considering.

4. Take better care of my skin
I usually take a shower at night, but when I don’t, I need to be more diligent about taking off my make-up.  Using a better moisturizer and maybe some anti-aging stuff (nothing hardcore).  I hear all those grocery store products actually work, but you should start before the problems actually begin.  I was going to do this around my 26th bday, but never got my act together.

5. Start Couponing
Several of my friends are those crazy couponers that get $100 worth of groceries but only pay $15.  They’ve begun to teach me their ways and now I just need to actually start trying it.

6. Cook more meals
L grew up eating out a lot, so our habit of hardly ever eating at home is nothing out of the ordinary for him.  For awhile, we did good coming up with menus and eating at home all the time.  We need to get back into this, both to save money and to eat better too.  This will hopefully go hand in hand with the couponing.  I hope that we can cut back to eating out only once or twice a week.

7. Do something about grad school
I’ve been toying with the idea of going back to school for quite some time.  For awhile it was for a career change, but now that I know there is a job out there that I like in my field, I want to proceed with getting my master’s.  My alma mater has a pretty good program, but because of my grades from undergrad, it will be difficult for me to get in.  It’s amazing how making a few mistakes your freshman year can affect you for so long.  I think I’ve got a shot, but we’ll see.  I want to at least look into it more, make sure we can afford it, perhaps apply.

8. Walk the puppies more
We FINALLY finished fencing in our backyard so the puppies get to run around a lot and they love it.  But I would still like to walk them more.  It’s hard because they don’t walk very well on a leash, and I think that’s what deters me from it, but they’re never going to learn if we don’t try.

9. Remain dedicated to my husband
L’s schedule can be trying sometimes.  It’s hard for me when he’s away at work and always busy.  I know there are people out there who have it way worse than me – all the military families serving our country – but it’s still hard.  I want us to continue to work to make our relationship and marriage the best it can be.  Because marriage is work, and we’ve got a great one. 

10. Begin researching our family tree
I had to do this once in elementary school and I’m always fascinated by history.  When at the beach for a friend’s bachelorette party this past spring, some of the other girls were talking about how they are very into their geneology and all the different things they have discovered while researching.  I was intrigued.  While watching TV the other day, I saw several commercials for ancestry.com and decided to check it out.  I tried their free trial.  I brought the idea up to L about working on his too and compiling them now that we’re married.  He liked it.  Although a website like ancestry.com isn’t necessary, it definitely  helps.  It’s rather expensive, especially to get the global version which I need more than L since my grandparents came through Ellis Island.  This will obviously a long-term project, but the goal is to get it started.

2010, you have been one hell of a year.  One that I will never, ever forget.  L and I will always celebrate you.  But 2011, watch out, I’m coming at you!

Run, Forrest, Run

I have never been a runner.  Never.  “The mile” was a dreaded phrase I associated with gym class since second grade when we had to start doing that as part of the physical fitness test. 

It hurts for me to run.  I get out of breath quickly and my chest becomes heavy and painful.  My legs and feet feel heavy too.  My hands get tingly and when I stop I feel light headed.  And, inevitably, I will always get a cramp in my side.

I have tried to focus on my breathing.  Keep a steady pace.  Not focus so much on how far the ending point is.  But it just never seems to help.  In my entire life, I have never run a full mile without stopping.

In school, I was often in the group that had to re-run it once, twice, three times, in order to get a passing time (don’t even get me started on those physical fitness tests, I think they’re a load of crap and not something you should be graded on).

I have never been seriously overweight.  Sure, I hate the way I look and I say that I’m fat all the time.  And according to most of those height/weight charts, I have been “too heavy” for my height since childhood (don’t get me started on those charts either, because I think they’re a load of crap too).  But really?  If you look at me, I am not obese.  Not at all.  And most of the time, you would never think that I weigh nearly as much as I actually do.  I’m sure as hell not a super model, and at the moment, I’m definitely heavier than I need to be.  But I’m not seriously overweight.

I’m not sure what the problem is, but apparently, I’ve never been very cardiovascularly fit.  I danced for 15 years growing up.  That was 15 years of feeling like I was going to die when I walked off stage because I couldn’t breathe.  It wasn’t until I was practically crawling out of the stage wings after a performance at a dance competition in high school when my parents had to carry me outside that I went to the doctor and was diagnosed with exercise enduced asthma.  I did the whole inhaler routine and all, and it was what it was, but at this point, I think I’m just not “fit.”

Even though I have never been a runner, I  have always wanted to be a runner.  I want to be one of those people that goes out for a run when they’re stressed and they feel good when they’re done, not like it was a punishment for a vicious crime they committed.

Over the last several months, I’ve talked about how I want to get in shape, get back to the size I was the year after I graduated college.  My goal was to not be embarrassed at the beach this summer or to not feel ugly and fat whenever L and I get married.  I’ve done ok, but haven’t lost more than three pounds, which really isn’t enough.

Last week, I came up with a new motivation.  I love to travel and I love pretty little southern cities.  You know, like Charleston.  I’ve been there a couple times before and it’s on my and L’s list of places we’d like to visit – especially since he’s never been.  But, we’re not the people that can just pick up and go to Charleston any weekend.  It’s about 4 1/2 hours away and it’s kind of expensive. 

But what takes place in Charleston every year that I would love to do?  The Cooper River Bridge Run.  I’ve heard of it before.  It’s a 10k race that thousands and thousands of people run in every year.  And then when I went to look up information on it, I saw this poster:

Image Courtesy of Cooper River Bridge Run

I want to run over that bridge.  In pretty Charleston.  And feel really good about myself and accomplish something that I never thought I could ever do in my entire life.  I want to run that 10k.  Those (approximately) 6 miles without stopping.

I brought the idea up to L.  He likes to run.  I asked him if he would be interested in doing this with me.  Next year (since this year’s is like this weekend).  He could easily work up to 6 miles in no time, but I on the other hand need plenty of time to practice (ok, “train”, but I’m a dancer by nature and I prefer “practice” ). 

I thought it would be something we could do together.  Something that was ours.  And our reward will be staying in town for a long weekend and do the race and site see and enjoy the city together.  He liked the idea.

But I would need his help.  I can’t do this by myself because I know I won’t be able to push myself hard enough.

So last night we started.  I met him at the fire station after work and we began our first practice.  We didn’t bring the puppies with us because they get too distracted and get in your way or stop to smell things or chase birds or what have you.  This is something I’m really serious about, so I needed to focus.

All weekend L had been getting me ready.  Randomly giving me tips.  Telling me what we were going to do.  How there were no excuses.  How I can run farther than I think I can.  Not to go into it saying I’ll do my best, but go into it telling myself that I can and will do it.

We took part of the route we normally take our walks on.  We know how far each section is.  First we walked a mile to get warmed up.  Then we ran a half mile.  It was hard, but I made it all the way to the end.  I know that a half mile may seem like nothing or may seem like something to laugh at for most people, but for me this was a HUGE deal.  Besides yesterday, I had only run a half mile one other time in my life.  And that was sometime last summer when L tried to get me into running.  Unfortunately then we let our busy schedules get in the way and were not consistent about it.  Now, we have vowed not to let that happen.

He talked me through it the whole way.  Telling me I was doing good and I could do it and as we got closer to the end of that half mile he told me he would run ahead of me, strip naked and be waiting for me off the side of the road where no one could see us (which by the way, L, you did not fulfill that promise ).

We walked another quarter of a mile and then ran another quarter.  I really and truly did not think I was going to make it that time.  I slowed down to what was barely a jog.  In fact, I think a turtle could have jogged faster.  But I didn’t stop.  I didn’t walk – not even one step. 

It was definitely NOT pretty.  I could barely pick up my feet and I’m sure I looked like I had gotten hit by a truck, but I was still doing it.

But hey, Phoebe doesn’t run pretty either

Even though I looked like a fool, the whole time L stayed with me and told me to keep going.  “You’re almost there, the stop sign is getting closer, don’t look at the ground, just a few more yards, hit the stop sign and you’re done.”

We walked another mile and a half before heading home for dinner.  I still didn’t feel great.  It took me a long time to catch my breath and not feel like I was going to die.  My hands were still tingly and my head was still a little foggy.  But I did it.  Obviously I still need to focus on my breathing.  And just do that half mile 11 more times in a row to do the race next April.

And now I’m kind of excited to go again today.  L is at work, but I’m still going to go on my own and hope that I can push myself like he helped me do yesterday.

What else is pushing me besides the fact that I want to actually run the whole 10k next year?  Obviously, it’s that I’m already planning my running outfit.  Seriously.  Pink running shorts and a black racer back tank top – or maybe vice versa.  I told you, as soon as event comes up, no matter what it is, I like to plan an outfit.

Oh yeah, and my mom bought me these.  They should arrive tomorrow, I think.  It was about time, I’ve had my sneakers since my junior year of college – which was 5 years ago.  Yeah, I think I was due for a new pair.

Image

See You at the Chase!

“Why yes, dear sir, I would like another drink.” 

“Oh my hat, why thank you, yours is lovely too, darling!”

We’re going to a Steeplechase next month and I could not be more excited! (I need your help at the end of this post!!)  I’ve never been big into horse racing, not for any particular reason.  I guess I was just never really exposed to it much.  But the last couple of years I’ve heard more and more about this one in the Charlotte area. 

Sundresses and hats and tailgating and friends.  What more could you ask for?

We tried to get a group together last year, but it ended up not working out.  But this year.  This year was a different story.  I was dead set on going.  Even if it were just L and I.  But obviously, it’s way more fun with a big group.

I started floating the idea around several weeks ago and got a great reception.  I just hoped that everyone would come through. 

Then I started thinking about what I would wear, because naturally, this is something I obsess about before any sort of ‘event.’   And then it dawned on me that you can’t get much preppier than a steeplechase and maybe, just maybe, if I get down on my hands and knees and beg and plead, I could talk L into wearing a tie that matches my dress.  Oh!  A Lilly tie that matches my Lilly dress!

But because I lost so much weight for awhile and then gained it all back, none of my Lilly Pulitzer dresses fit anymore, they’re all too small.   So, naturally I went to Ebay.

And I hit the jackpot.  I found a women selling a cute Lilly (in a pattern that I had previously drooled over in the store) and was also selling a matching tie.  And miraculously, the dress was in my size.  And both items were a fantastic price with extremely cheap shipping (and if you’re an avid ebayer, you know they can really get you with the shipping prices).

I asked L.  And begged and pleaded.  And he agreed that if I won the auction he would wear this lovely pink and green tie. 

So I bid. And I won.

I now had our outfits.  We started looking at the pricing info for tickets, decided on what we thought was best and sent out an email to all of our friends.  And now we’ve got a big group going.  One of my friends has gathered an additional 15 other people to come in.  I don’t know them, but I think it’s going to be a grand time!

Then I started searching for a hat.  And I kept finding all of these really cute black hats.  Which would not go with my Lilly at all, but would look fabulous with the pink sundress I bought at J.Crew when were at the beach.  And I would LOVE to wear that dress, but I was really excited about this matching tie thing (I’m a dork, I know).  Plus, I KNOW L will not wear the tie if I don’t wear the dress.

But, I thought, at least I have the J.Crew dress as a back up.  You see, the Lilly is lovely and fits nicely, except in the hips.  It is quite tight. And although I have about a month and a half till the race, and I’m doing better about my eating and exercising, I just don’t know if I’ll be able to cut it.  Although, I could always wear some spanx and that would probably help.

On my way home from work last night I quickly stopped into another Stein Mart (I had already been to one at lunch, plus 2 Marshalls) to look for a hat.  I pulled into the parking space and staring back at me from the window display was this gorgeous pink and green dress.

That’s perfect, I thought to myself.  And honestly, I probably squeeled outloud too.

But I already have two dresses I could wear.  And then I realized why I loved it so much.  It looks exactly like a Molly B. dress I had found that I wanted to wear to my college graduation.  Besides the fact that that dress was $250+, I couldn’t track it down in my size.  This was my chance to finally have it – or it’s twin, anyway.

After I searched the store for hats (and found a black one as another contender for the J.Crew dress), I found the dress on the rack.  And it’s only $40 – not bad if you ask me.  I tried it on and it fits and it’s so cute.  But I wondered if the high neckline makes me look too old (I’m still having issues with this whole being 26 thing).

I used my better judgement and put it back, left the store and called my mom to tell her my dilemma.  She jokingly suggested that I just wear all three dresses and have dress changes that day since we’ll be there from about 10am – 7pm.  Ha. 

I just don’t know what to do.  I already have shoes that I could wear with any of the three dresses.  I have found hats that I like that I could wear with any of the three dresses.  I just don’t know which one to choose.  I keep leaning toward the Lilly (providing it fits better by then) because I love the idea of L’s matching tie and it’s unlikely that I would be able to get him to wear our outfit combination another time (unless maybe we go next year).

So I’m asking your advice.  Which should I choose.  Let’s just assume, for argument’s sake, that the Lilly fits fine.

Dress #1 – Lilly Pulitzer – with tie in matching pattern for L
Would wear with pearls, white or pink hat and cute pink sandals
PS – sorry it’s blurry

Dress #2 – J.Crew
Would wear with pearls, silver Tiffany beads or some sort of black beaded necklace; cute black sandals and a black hat
*it’s dark pink by the way, not red

Dress #3 – Found in Stein Mart last night – looks like the Molly B. dress I wanted for college graduation.
Would wear with pearls, cute pink sandals and a pink hat

Busy

This week has been quite busy at work.  I have a deadline on Friday that I was freaking out about because I didn’t think I was going to get everything done, but now I think everything will be complete (although I’m planning on coming in at 7:30 tomorrow and Friday).

My four hour interview is tomorrow at 1.  I got a schedule of the afternoon and I’m basically just meeting with a lot of different people.  I get a 15 minute break though – I suppose that should be used to pee and get some water because I’m sure my mouth will be dry from talking so much.  It’s times like this when I realize that going through sorority rush, both as a rushee and as a sister, really teaches you a lot.  All that talking.  And about the same stuff over and over. 

Anyway, I never really thought about it until Monday, but I have NOTHING to wear.  Seriously.  I have no need to wear suits at my current job. 

I have three from my last job.  One has been in a dirty clothes dry cleaning bag since before I moved to Charlotte – so.  you know.  2 1/2 years.  It’s a nice suit, but no time to dry clean it.  And I’m not Febreezing it.  I don’t think Febreeze can handle 2 1/2 years.  Hmm… I wonder what else is in that bag. 

I have another suit that was cheap (and kind of looked it) that I bought from H&M in a pinch before my very first job interview out of college.  I didn’t care about the job and knew I wouldn’t take it, but I went for the interview experience.  It fit then, but I’m pretty sure it’s too small now.

My third suit I love!  It’s a gray Calvin Klein.  And I got it on some ridiculously great sale at Macy’s.  Alas, I bought it because my other two suits were too big for me because I had lost so much weight.  Well, I’ve gained that weight back, plus some, so I know it won’t fit.

I thought about trying to wear the jacket with a pair of black pants, but I think even the jacket is too small.  I wore it for my new headshot last year when we redid the company’s web site and it was kind of tight then.  And, you guessed it, I’ve gained some weight since then too.

I looked online at Macy’s, but they didn’t have any skirt suits I liked, and the pants never fit me right, they’re always too short. 

So, I checked at two Marshall’s stores today.  Absolutely nothing.  I’m going to check one other on my way home.  Luckily there is a NY & Co. in the same shopping center – I’m hoping I might have some luck there.

If not, there is always a Banana Republic in that shopping center too.  I really, really, REALLY do NOT want to go there because they are so ridiculously expensive, but if I have to, I will.  I hate to spend too much money on one because I’m really trying to lose weight and not put it back on this time.  I know I could always have it tailored later, but you know…

So… wish me luck with that endeavor tonight.  Also, a new woman started at work and she is annoying me already.  She doesn’t know how to use an Outlook calendar (really?  it’s not brain surgery) and when it comes to building a media list online (which is the only way I’ve done it), she is clueless – she has only done it the really old school way by using these mammoth sized books.  If you know what I’m talking about, then you’ll understand how pathetic this is.

Anyway, I digress…

What a Surprise!

I had a really great surprise this weekend, all thanks to L.  I had passed on an invite to a piano bar for a friend of a friend’s birthday on Friday night.  I’m really trying to save money, plus it was probably like an hour and a half from my house and I wouldn’t be able to go home between work and going out.

Instead, I came home, did some stuff around the house and hung out with the puppy dogs since L was at work.  I was talking to him some time that evening when he asked me for the 9 millionth time if we had any plans the next night.  When I told him no, he said ‘ok, do you want to know what your surprise is?’

A surprise?!?!?  Heck yeah.

He was going to take me to go see RENT Saturday night.  This was one of the sweetest, most perfect things he could have done.

“I know it’s not flowers, but I hope you like it…”

Back in December I had made tentative plans with E and LM to get tickets and go (after L and I saw the filmed version of the last B’way performance, I didn’t think he would want to go again).  We never got tickets though.  Two weeks ago E texted me and asked if we were still going, if not, she was going to go to the circus.

I wanted to go, but frankly just didn’t have the money to spend on the ticket.  I’m really trying hard to cut my spending as part of my New Year’s resolutions and am doing pretty good.  As much as I wanted to see it, I’ve already seen it 12 or 13 other times, so I guess I could forego it.

When I told L that we weren’t going anymore he offered to buy my ticket for me.  I told him no, but thank you, and it didn’t matter because the travelling cast is never as good anyway.

Which, is kind of true.  Except this time.  Because Anthony Rapp and Adam Pascal – the two original actors who played the main characters were touring.  I’d never seen either one of them and was really excited.  But we weren’t going anymore and that was that.

L said he was going to wait until Saturday night to tell me, but he wanted to make sure that I really did want to go.  He had a feeling that my excuse of not wanting to see the travelling cast was just a lie.  He was right.  He knows me too well.

So we went.  And it was great.  They did change one part with respect to how a few of the lines in a scene were delivered, but other than that, it was great.  L said he enjoyed it, and enjoyed it much better than the last time when he had no idea what was going to happen next.  I think I still saw him cringe when Angel came out in her drag the first time though.

Sunday wasn’t too exciting either.  I cleaned the house and painted some trim in the living room and hallway and then had the Super Bowl on in the background and only watched the commercials.

L called (he was working again) to tell me that the woman in the Careerbuilder ad who pulled into the parking lot and then started screaming because she hated her job reminded him of me.  It reminded me of me too.

And now it’s back to the grind.  I’m really nervous about my interview Thursday.  But I am looking forward to the fact that L has off every Saturday and Sunday for the rest of the month.  I’m going to get spoiled.

On the Way

My New Year’s resolutions are going ok.  The whole getting in shape is the one that is slow going.  I do good for a day, and then when I try to reward myself with one cookie, I eat three.  But, it’s still better than before. So.  Baby steps.

I’ve been taking the puppies for short walks many days when I get home from work and we’ve been playing more in the house too.  They always play in the house, but I’m playing with them more.  Specifically, trying to teach them to play a game of fetch that actually results in the object coming back to me.  Currently they sit and wait for me to throw it.  Run like crazy maniacs after it.  Shep is the one who always picks it up and Dixie is waiting a couple feet away from him and then attacks him like she’s some sort of linebacker blocking an opponent (ed note: I know nothing about football, so if ‘linebacker’ is inappropriate, just substitute it with whatever is appropriate ). 

And today was a happy day.  I paid off one of my credit cards!!  Woohoo!  Granted, this one had hardly anything of a balance left on it, and it was slowly dwindling on it’s own.  And I still have the one big one and the other that my parents are helping me get rid of.  But paying off this one was an accomplishment nonetheless. 

Now I can take the money I used for that payment every month and put it towards my other card.  And, as it is, I am a month ahead on that card now, so that makes me feel happy!

I’ll get there, slowly, but surely.